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    10/23/2009

    my years won't go back

    CPDO这次请的教授是个很有意思的人,有很多话语和想法让我听了有些敲心肺的感觉。
    他说到陪孩子一起去玩,说很忙本来安排不过来,可是他觉得孩子的童年是一去不复返的,they won't be five years old again.

    在石同学过生日午夜,我却抑郁的呆在实验室,不想回家,不想说话,没有一样东西做成了的,没有一件事情值得高兴。

    石头生日快乐,可是,我却不快乐。我也多么想抓住青春的尾巴轻松快乐阳光明媚的过日子,可是为什么我们却像旋转木马奔波不止却看从未前进,没有哪一分钟是顺畅的呼吸……石同学没有来的时候我时刻不安的用尽力气的要他过来,石同学在身边了却多了更多无数的操心,我们笨拙的像一个未成年的孩子学会当另一个未成年的孩子的家长,我感觉自己读PhD简直就是一个癞蛤蟆一不小心做了一个长长的吃了难以消化的天鹅肉的白日梦,想醒来却睁不开眼……

    写下这些字的时候小伊整理完数据离开了,然后我的泪水就涌出来。想起老妈说,你这一年多,长肥了,长难看了,你怎么就不会好好照顾自己啊……还有老板说,你平常是个欢乐的人,所以你的抑郁别人看不出来。

    哭出来心里好受些。

    石头,生日快乐,你一定想不到我没有忘记礼物和水果蛋糕。

    Comments (10)

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    lizzy longwrote:
    come on baby! I will fight together with u!
    Oct. 31
    文婧 陈wrote:
    人家都说产后抑郁,你没产怎么也抑郁? 难道是产前抑郁?
    Oct. 25
    growing can be a happy process, just don't look back, however beautiful it was.
    at least, your love is within touch, what else matters?
    Oct. 24
    萌 吴wrote:
    PatPat, Everything's gonna be alright~
    Oct. 23
    Cai Caiwrote:
    很有同感。来了美国,就觉得自己的心在沉浮。有时高兴,有时抑郁,呵呵。
    不过,有个人在身边,一起关心、奋斗,是件幸运的事,心还是要安定些,羡慕一下,呵呵。
    祝小馨抑郁期早点过去。
    Oct. 23
    Xiaowrote:
    啊~ 我突然发现~ 难道你家石同学的生日跟我是同一天?!
    人一直都是这么个循环过程呀 永远不知足 不停地前进着 于是总也停不下来好好享受一下收获的快乐
    呵呵 送给你一段话:
    幸福是什麽???
    幸福是睡得好......
    幸福是你喜欢的人也喜欢你
    幸福是随便走走没目的什麽也不想
    幸福是冬天等巴士时喝热维他奶
    幸福是看一本精采的好书
    幸福是想起心上人而偷笑
    幸福是情人用体温为你送暖
    幸福是生活简单
    幸福是和心爱的人一起看星星
    每个人都需要幸福
    你幸福吗?
    你同意吗?
    Oct. 23
    Jinxi Liwrote:
    your boss seems to be so sweet. mine will say you have no reason to be depressed, you should fight!
    Oct. 23
    婕 旋wrote:
    人的勇气应该不是平白无故生出来的吧,我想,经历这些考验都是为了便得更加坚强,等到心中的乌云过后,一切一定会变得比以前更好。。更何况出路根本不值一条啊,不管怎样,坚持下去都是为了证明自己能够做到,,有一句话说,不快乐要比快乐辛苦很多,如果能够轻松的快乐,就不要把那么多负担放在自己心上了,,小馨,,要加油啊~~要相信会有雨过天晴的那一天!!!:)
    Oct. 23
    Xinwrote:
    don't feel sad honey, i just like whining.
    Oct. 23
    Tracywrote:
    why I feel so sad after reading this blog..anyway..cheer up..everything will be all right~~
    Oct. 23

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